Divorcing Worry, Embracing Joy | Alson.AI

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A young girl growing up in Kashmir meets a constant companion named Worry that whispers it will keep her safe in frightening times. As she grows into adulthood far from the conflict zone, Worry still visits each night and turns every small challenge into a looming catastrophe. One day she finds the strength to pause and decide she no longer wants to be married to fear. With the help of a caring friend she symbolically divorces Worry and opens her heart to Joy and a new life of happiness.

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This is a story of a bond I formed when I was ten years old, though I didn't know the name of the vow I was taking then.

It is a story about how survival became a habit, and how I finally learned to break it.

I am married to worry!

When worry became my partner, I don’t know, but I have been with it for as far as I can remember.

It is not a casual acquaintance or a distant relative; it is a companion that colors my thoughts, my day, my time on earth

It knows the rhythm of my heart better than I do. But finally, I have decided to break up. I want a divorce

I am divorcing worry and making room to court joy so I may have a chance at happiness

To understand this separation, I have to look back at the courtship. When did worry first find me?

I trace the timeline back through the geography of my memory.

In the crackdowns of the 1990s in Kashmir, maybe a bit earlier when I was studying in school and had to take exams.

I recall the small, fluttering anxiety of a test paper, the innocent fear of failure. But that was just a flirtation.

It was definitely in the 1990s in Kashmir when the relationship became binding.

That was when people disappeared and things went upside down. It wasn't just grades anymore; it was existence.

The army was everywhere, olive drab staining the pristine landscape.

Houses were searched in the dead of night, the heavy thud of boots replacing the sounds of crickets.

I was small, standing only four feet seven inches, watching the adults tremble.

That was definitely the time I married worry: it has been most loyal to me and has never left my side.

When I was small, it whispered that if I stayed vigilant, if I worried enough, I could keep us safe.

Even though I am far away from Kashmir or the 1990s, living a life that looks nothing like a conflict zone, the contract remains.

I still sleep with it every night and wake up next to it, until it colors every little challenge.

It translates a delayed email into a catastrophe; it turns a silent phone into a tragedy.

Sometimes it’s not there, lulling me into a false sense of peace.

But when a small challenge comes, there it is—worry in my face, reminding me that disaster is always around the corner.

So finally, a challenge came—a new hurdle in my adult life—and the familiar panic rose. But this time, I paused.

I looked at this partner that had protected me as a child but was suffocating me as a woman. I decided I am divorcing worry.

I wanted to scream from the top of the buildings in Manhattan: "I am divorcing worry!"

I imagined the wind would carry the declaration of my divorce through the canyons of the city.

I told this to the professional who helps me untangle these knots.

He said, "Don’t worry, worry will have a line of suitors. And definitely don’t worry about that."

"Just go and declare your divorce so joy can find you."

He is right. Worry is attractive to many; it promises control in an increasingly unpredictable chaotic world.

But I am done with that illusion.

Regardless of what the challenge is, worry will no longer be partners with me in solving anything.

The papers are signed. I am ready to be courted by joy.

overcoming fear

childhood anxiety

finding joy

emotional resilience

mental health

self confidence

inspirational story